A 21-video piece, “To ‘Matt’ – My Muse & Inspiration”, tells the very specific love story of my life. My Old Story, from age 15 on, was characterized by attractions to and with boys/men who were like me – desperately wanting, more than anything, a complete, intimate relationship but, for one reason or another, ‘unavailable’. This recurring relationship scenario left me living my romantic dreams vicariously through films, television, and my own creations in my mind. It wasn’t until my Healing Year in Michigan that I discovered this pattern would not change until I changed. I had no conscious awareness of the fact that I would NEVER attract what I wanted until I first fell in love with myself, which would then allow me to finally be emotionally available to someone else in the very deep manner that I so much desired.
In the past 2 1/2 years, as I’ve transitioned into my New Story, I’ve possessed an entirely different energy pertaining to romantic partnerships. I no longer feel as if I need a man to complete my life but instead very much want a man with whom to share this beautiful journey – for however long the relationship is meant to last. This man …’Matt’ … he will always hold the distinction of being the first man to cross my path from this very new place. Unique because energies from BOTH stories (my Old and New) brought our life journeys together. And if you remember, I do not believe in coincidences or accidents.
What I’ve been able to do in this past year has been inspired by him more so than any other single person in my world despite our ‘relationship’ being 99% a story of my creation. The 1% non-fiction, mutual part of our ‘relationship’ revealed such an intense connection, that it brought alive within me things I didn’t even know I could or wanted to do. Just this 1% potential for love with this person, from the place of my amazing new Story, was enough to literally draw the music out of me. And for this, I will be eternally grateful. Even if I never see him again, the love I have (and will always have) for him is very real. This compilation is my expression of that immense appreciation & love. Thank you, ‘Matt’. From the depths of my soul…thank you.
Set 1 (Released on 9/21)
1. ‘Travelin’ Soldier’ (Dixie Chicks)
2. ‘Blame it on the Rain’ (Milli Vanilli – or, more appropriately, whoever was really singing)
3. ‘Under the Boardwalk’ (Bette Midler)
4. ‘More Than Words’ (Extreme)
5. ‘Stay’ (Lisa Loeb – audio only – 2nd ever song recorded)
Set 2 (Released on 9/22)
6. ‘Without You What Do I Do With Me’ (Tanya Tucker)
7. ‘One More Night’ (Phil Collins)
8. ‘All Out of Love’ (Air Supply)
9. ‘Fidelity’ (Regina Spektor)
10. ‘Such Great Heights’ (The Postal Service)
Set 3 (Released on 9/23)
11. ‘Don’t Take the Girl’ (Tim McGraw)
12. ‘Way Back Into Love’ (Video version – Drew Barrymore & Hugh Grant)
13. ‘Angel’ (Jack Johnson)
14. ‘Bubbly’ (Colbie Caillat)
15. ‘I’m Yours’ (Jason Mraz)
Set 4 (Released on 9/24)
16. ‘Borderline’ (Madonna)
17. ‘I Don’t Know How to Love Him’ (Video version)
18. ‘Making Love Out of Nothing At All’ (Air Supply)
19. ‘Happy Birthday, ‘Matt” (Krishna Das singing ‘Namah Shivaya’)
20. ‘Crazy For You’ (Madonna)
21. ‘Something So Right’ (Trisha Yearwood)
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